Random Things You Can Imagine Madonna Saying

[Bobo 1,220]

Just for fun, lunch break during painting today 

"Oh please, don't talk to me about sex, I LITERALLY wrote the book on it!" 

Who else do you know that can actually say that and mean it?! 

 

[Israel 7,670]

Madonna is in silence jijijiji

[Guest]

"These people are seriously my fans?"  

[madgefan 10,237]

"Woops, we've run out of toilet paper" 

[gafuller 1,678]

i imagine she cusses under her breath a lot.

Breaks a nail, "Sh*t."

Notices a fly on her stage, "Sh*t!"

[Bobo 1,220]

Elton John walks past at an event... 

"Nice ass!" (sticks fingers down throat) 

[tripdastati0n 19]

fukmeharder, bitch im madonna. during sex

[BringUrLUV 1,114]

"What do you mean guac is extra?"

[gafuller 1,678]

1 hour ago, BringUrLUV said:

"What do you mean guac is extra?"

"What do you mean it's not in the computer!?"

[Bobo 1,220]

"I'm not singing that song" 

[gafuller 1,678]

"Okay, like, how about I do Like a Virgin invetween these two song... and medley it with Candyshop. Like a Candyshop."

[Eyzonme 932]

"MDNA SKIN MDNA SKIN ... must mention MDNA SKIN at least twice today on Social Media"

[Bobo 1,220]

"What's the words again? You sure that's one of mine?" 

"Guy, how about I do the whole show with the grills?" 

[cosmicarlo818 2,021]

"Hi Stefani baby girl it's your sis M! Btw I listened to that demo you sent me... Girl can I guest vocal and we can slay the business already? I absolutely loathe the other demo Cher sent me though lulz" 

 

[Eyzonme 932]

"Guy what you mean you are on holidays with the family? I need you now to send me through all those movie scripts people want me to make into movies"

- Guy doesn't respond 

(15 mins later on Guy's Instagram)

"I need you. Call me (insert every single Emoji ever created)"

[Bobo 1,220]

"Hi Jnr, this is Madonna, again. You still haven't returned my call."

[gafuller 1,678]

14 hours ago, AspergerArtist said:

"Hi Jnr, this is Madonna, again. You still haven't returned my call."

"Hey Jr it's Madonna again. I'm in Lisbon, call me."

[G House 1,961]

Guy: "For the next tour your fans want you to sing Physical Attraction."

M: "Physical what?"

[Bobo 1,220]

"Kiss Drake on stage, they said. It'll be fun, they said..." 

[Bobo 1,220]

"Knock, knock. Who's there? Bitch. Bitch who? Bitch I'm Madonna!" (laughs hysterically) 

[Guest]

"Hmmm? What can I post today that is so vague that will allow the fans to make up some wild assumption about me or my new album?"

[G House 1,961]

*Takes phone to the bathroom, opens the camera, gets ready for the picture*

"Now this is my best angle, it shows who I am as an artist and that I am a mysterious woman. It also shows my boobs, which is great."

*Takes picture*

 

[NowRadiate 3,334]

Hilarious.

None of you feels close. 

 

[dylanlioncourt 5,916]

"They want me to sing what?" 

[Bobo 1,220]

"I should do a cookbook.... Oh wait, I don't cook!"